Today I am grateful for giving in. I have lived my life according to what I am “supposed” to do. And the truth is it always felt incomplete, forced, and lacking. I always knew there was more to it—I always felt it in my bones and that feeling drove me to always search for something. The reality is that in order to experience that something more you need to be in touch with what it is you want. More importantly you have to be in touch with what you are meant to do, not what you are told to do. So I gave into what I had always heard my intuition telling me: just live. This is the first step of many, but heeding that voice without question or hesitation felt 100% right.
Today I am grateful for progress. Yes, I have been grateful for progress before, and no matter how redundant, I will always be grateful for it. Progress is the evidence that life isn’t stagnant. Progress is the yielded result. And as cliché as it sounds, that little bit of effort every day adds up.
Today I am grateful for rest. I did not sleep well last night—I haven’t been sleeping well for the last three weeks to be honest—and I had a ton of work to get done today. I woke up at 5:30AM expecting to have to clean up nothing but mess and a laundry list I feared would never get done. All I could do was simply put one foot in front of the other and start. Slowly but surely the things got done. I listened to my body and rested when I needed to. A quick 30 minute power nap did the trick and kept me going.
Today I am grateful for our health. Last week we lost a close friend of ours due to some unexpected complications during surgery. There are a slew of things related to his passing and his lifestyle choices that made us take pause in where we are. Neither my husband nor myself are kids anymore and seeing how vulnerable we are, how vulnerable we ALL are made us think about our lifestyle choices and how we need to take care of ourselves moving forward.
Today I am grateful for the direction my life is going. Not long ago I felt discontent with where I was. I had to force myself to do anything. Motivation was nonexistent. Happiness felt fleeting. While things haven’t magically resolved themselves, I did a lot of soul searching and owned that I felt that way because of my own choices. The simple action of ownership made me snap out of it. We have one life and the bottom line is we can’t sit around waiting for things to fall into our laps to make us happy. We have to consciously choose to change the things that no longer fit for us.
Today I am grateful to take action. There isn’t a feeling quite like when you finish something. The universe works in our favor when we decide to act. As a perfectionist I spent a lot of time waiting for the right moment to act—we all know how that story goes: nothing gets done. I spent even more time benching myself because I was either nervous about looking like a fool or not confident in my ability to learn as I went. The truth is not as many people pay attention to you as you think so I heeded that advice and started doing the things I enjoyed doing. And the universe responded. The bottom line is the universe will move on no matter what you do—you may as well do what you love and join the game. Learn to play your hand and see where it takes you.