Sunday Gratitude

Photo by Oleksandr Pidvalnyi on

Today I am grateful for an actual stop.  I have paused on much of the work I was doing even a week ago.  It’s a strange feeling.  There is more time available, and I feel like I have room to breathe.  I miss some of the work I was doing because it’s the work I actually want to spend my time on.  But the pause has allowed me to find what I really value and I will be able to come up with a plan to start working on those things.  Sometimes we don’t realize we are running in circles until we are forced to stop.  I can’t say it has been fun questioning what I want, and finding a way to do it all.  But the way I was going wasn’t working either so there is purpose in the pause and I am grateful for the lesson.

Today I am grateful for friends.  People can surprise us and sometimes you have to go with the spur of the moment invitations.  We took some friends up on such an offer last night and it turned out to be a fantastic time.  Life gets hectic and chaotic and loud and if we don’t tell it to stop, if we don’t introduce some fun, if we don’t allow input from others we spiral out of control while we are trying to control everything.  There are moments we need to simply let go of it all.  Completely take our hands off the wheel and engage in some silliness and laughter.  It truly is the best medicine and if you have people who are willing to provide that, then don’t let that go wasted. 

Today I am grateful for beginnings.  It will never cease to amaze me how often we have to start over or how often we repeat in order to learn.  I’ve spent a lot of time doing work on myself, learning to love myself, learning to believe in myself, learning to connect with myself.  Some may say this is self-obsessed and to a degree that is true.  But I’ve learned that we can’t operate at the extremes.  We can’t give entirely because there is nothing for us, we can’t take entirely because we overfill, but there is a happy medium.  When we find the spot where we are full and our energies run over onto other people, we create miracles and blessings through authentically being.  But I’ve been humbled over the last week and have learned that all the work is just ticking a box if we don’t integrate it.  We can KNOW things but if we don’t know who we are, the application is for show.  So we get other chances to move forward.  I am grateful to keep going and learning and developing into who I need to be.

Today I am grateful for learning.  Continuing on the same vein of beginnings, I’m grateful to continue the evolution of who I am.  I’m grateful to learn where I am wrong and where I need work.  I am grateful to learn where I am stronger than I thought.  I’m grateful to know where my limits really are and I am grateful to feel my way into the life I really want to experience.  I don’t know it all.  No one does and, as I said above, reading the books to mark that off the list of doing the work doesn’t mean diddly.  You have to do the work to become the person you want to be.  We have to constantly be open.  We have to be willing to learn and adapt and take in new perspectives all the time. We have to see values in others, in their differences, and in their strengths just as much as we need to see the same value in ourselves.  We need to know who we are and express that without diminishing the gifts of others.  Learn to live in that expression and put aside the notions of what you thought.  Have fun and allow the layers to continue to unfold.

Today I am grateful for the lesson on control.  You can probably tell this has been a theme for me over the last few weeks.  I’ve had to do some deep work into my patterns that lead me to control.  I talk about it in more depth this week.  There are parts of me that I thought I was simply right to accept because I allowed that to be my personality.  But recent events have given me pause on where I stand with controlling things.  There is power in addressing what is ours to own and there is power in letting the rest fall away.  Control is an illusion and I’ve discussed that many times here.  Sometimes we need the reminder when we aren’t sure if that lesson applies to us as well.  Little secret: it does.  So I am grateful for the outside perspective I needed to guide me in a better direction for myself and my relationships and how I show up for people.  It isn’t about controlling their actions, it’s about creating presence for them—and we need to give that to ourselves as well.  So, like I said above, I am also grateful for the stop so I can create presence in my life.

Today I am grateful to let go.  It’s a gorgeous fall day and we spent most of the morning playing.  We had a quick breakfast, took our son to get his hair cut, did some shopping, decided to paint the bathroom a really fun metallic blue, I did my meal prep, did laundry and dishes, and helped my son with his homework.  Nothing was entirely planned but we somehow got it all done.  I even managed to put up all the fall decorations for Thanksgiving.  During all of that, all I kept thinking was that this exactly the way I love for the day to flow.  I got so much work done this morning, I set myself up for the whole week to open time for other things.  We had fun, we were present, we enjoyed each other, and we felt alive—I know I did.  I sang for the first time in a long time as well and it felt so good.  Now I see the sun setting as I sit here in my office and I feel peace.  This is probably the most content I’ve been in the last two weeks.  And I am grateful for my life.  I am so grateful for the reminder that I need to be present and stay connected.  As important as goals and action are, as important as the future is, all we have is now.  All I have is now.  Sitting here with the sun beaming in my office, a cat curled on my lap, feeling grateful to be alive.  What a gift.

Wishing everyone a wonderful week ahead.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s