Hidden Parts Revealed

Photo by Alexander Grigorian on Pexels.com

One facet of the story I shared yesterday that I want to emphasize is what it feels like to open up in person.  I’m a pretty open book and I don’t hold back much.  Many times, that has been to my detriment as I either overwhelm people or they don’t understand or my story is simply not for them.  This is a result of social anxiety as well as a deep pressing need to be accepted.  But there are some pieces of myself, the ones that are really precious that I keep tucked away.  How people receive the “worst” parts of me determines if they get the best parts of me.  I also tend to keep the parts that are brewing fairly quiet—hence why I never really discussed much of my business with my coworkers. The point of all this is that I’m a mixed bag to most people.  I’m either over or under-sharing and I know that confuses some.  I share on this platform in an effort to let others feel seen as well, but at work, it’s all, well, work.

Sharing stories here is far easier regardless because I am protected behind the screen and keyboard and however many miles physically lie between us.  Sharing the stories I do in person is a different thing—same can be said about my business and those precious jewels.  It’s also scary to share parts of yourself with people who know you one way.  They have their ideas engrained and shifting their mindset can be challenging.  And changing their mindset should never be the point, but we often look to those who know us to know us as we really are and if they can’t pivot with you, we feel isolated or lost or like we’ve failed.  I believe in my business.  I believe in my purpose—to help people awaken to their greatest potential.  I believe in the power of people—I know we can change the way things are.  But the people I see on a daily basis don’t necessarily feel that way.

In sharing the truth and the details of what I do face to face with this group, I saw a shift when they recognized the authenticity in what I’m doing.  It was no longer about convincing them a product works and that we need to take charge of our futures.  It was about showing them what I believe actually works for me.  It’s about giving them hope to try it for themselves.  And on a personal level, it was about feeling comfortable enough to share the parts of me I believe in.  I tend to do this thing where I’m comfortable sharing my trauma.  It never felt like a big deal because I had no shortage of it.  I assumed it was the norm.  But sharing something I was excited about felt too personal because I didn’t want to risk being embarrassed if it fell apart.  Plus I didn’t want to have to maintain a falsely positive attitude if things did start going south.  I learned that I can’t anticipate the negative.  More specifically, if I CAN anticipate the negative, I can learn to anticipate the positive as well.

As corny as it sounds, this whole time it wasn’t about establishing that belief in a thing.  It was establishing belief in myself.  That is something I’ve sorely lacked for nearly my entire life.  There is a marked difference in being who I am versus convincing people who I am.  Again, it’s easy to do that behind a keyboard, but when you do that face to face, you see people’s reactions on their face.  I’ve been trained to anticipate the negative so I always thought people would react negatively to my authentic self.  But I never gave them the chance to see the real me.  Sharing this side of me showed me unequivocally that I can be accepted as I am and that what I have to offer, whether a product or my story, is needed and will continue to be accepted.  Let people see you.

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