“Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it,” Maya Angelou. This is a little reminder to keep true to yourself. As we work on changing and upgrading our mindset, it becomes more and more important to interact with our true selves and learn what we want/need. We need to trade the ideas of what we thought we needed for what we actually need and we also need to redefine what success means and looks like. We need to start considering what it feels like. If you’re miserable sitting in your mansion, then that level of arguable monetary success means nothing. It’s a false symbol of success because it is taking something from you rather than contributing to you and your purpose. Real success looks and feels good. It’s about the freedom to live your life how you want to live it and how freely you are able to share and contribute your gift. More importantly, it’s about feeling good doing what you do. We’ve been trained to forget that.
Most of our time is spent doing things on other people’s behalf whether it is working for a corporation, taking care of our families, meeting social obligations that stretch our dollars, and trying to keep up appearances with those around us. I’m telling you now, if you don’t like any facet of that, it’s a waste of time. You can never find your purpose, your calling if you are putting on airs and being something you’re not. You aren’t living your purpose if you’re living for someone else’s validation or to their expectations. This requires deep work and the ability to let go of what others tell you to do. It requires knowing what you need and the strength to see that through. It also requires blinders and ear plugs because others will try to pull you back in at all costs.
Finding yourself and honoring who that is can be a lonely and even stressful path in the beginning. The people we love and who we thought supported us come out as only supporting the version of ourselves that served them. There are people who simply won’t understand these new parts of you. But in order to move forward, you need to put that aside and step into the authentic version of you. All of this starts with what we talked about yesterday—recognizing stressors in our life and getting rid of it. I’m not talking about the positive stressors in life such as overcoming the obstacles toward reaching a goal we are actively seeking. I’m talking about the distress, the stress that drains us and feels heavy. The things we want to avoid but feel we have to attend or are responsible for.
So going back to what success looks like. I’m learning as I do more research and practice more in my own life, that it isn’t so much about look. It’s about feel. Quite simply it’s about what feels good to us and yes, I’m talking about physically feeling good as well as mentally. No one can tell you what that means to you. You have to be in touch with yourself enough to know what that means to you. Some people find joy in running, others find joy in reading, others find joy in meditation or gardening. The key is what brings you that joy—that’s an indicator it’s something that feels good. The other key is asking yourself what task do you take on willingly that absorbs you, that excites you, that doesn’t feel like work no matter how much you do it. Those are good indicators those are things that fulfill your purpose and you should continue to steward your life in that direction. When you can say you’re proud of what you’ve done and you are content with what you did and how you got there, then you’re a success.