I want to share this obvious reminder as a follow up to our discussion on new goals.  We’ve talked about similar topics before but I thought this concept was interesting because we need to know who we are so we can recognize who others are.  Then we can honor those little details about them to show we care who they are and we understand them and are grateful to have them in our lives.  Conversely, when we know who others are and we pay attention to their needs, we learn to identify our own needs.  The whole of energy exchange is about finding that authenticity in ourselves and others. Honoring the value in others helps us honor the value in ourselves and vice versa.  It’s like what we discussed yesterday—knowing how to meet our own needs helps us meet other’s needs and meeting others needs (as appropriate) helps us learn how to meet our needs.  Energy is an exchange.  There is nothing to suggest that any one person’s needs are less valuable than anyone else’s.  In fact, the more our needs are met, the higher the likelihood that we can and will help others.   

The whole reason I wanted to evaluate my goals was because I see how my anxiety and my fears make it too easy to hide or point fingers at others, and quite frankly, how it can make us a little selfish. It truly isn’t intentional and it probably came from the fact that my needs/wants were treated as an inconvenience or something to be met when there was time.  I spent so much time focusing on what I needed because I was afraid I wouldn’t get what I needed.  I had to find ways to meet my own needs—I was provided for materially, but emotionally I was bankrupt and it was very clear that our person didn’t matter, pleasing others came first.  I also spent a lot of time trying to get recognition and attention from others to prove I was worthy of what I needed or what I wanted.  That made me hyper aware of how I came across to people and I got really messed up when people didn’t seem to understand me or when others got what I thought I earned.  So now, instead of focusing on what others have, I like to focus on how I can contribute.  Their success is my success.

That pivot makes it clear that it isn’t about who is better or worse or even who is worthy—we are all worthy.  We all have unique gifts and ways to serve—and we have unique ways of sharing/exchanging energy.  We have the ability to make the choice and it’s important to make sure we honor everyone as best as we can.  That isn’t to say that we have to meet all people’s needs at all times or even that we have to agree with everyone.  It is to say that sometimes getting outside of ourselves and seeing that everyone is doing their best in a really messed up system is enough.  We are all worthy and when we help in ways that serve, we highlight that worthiness.  Our value isn’t in what we earn or what we acquire, it’s in how we use our gifts to help others.  It’s in how we show others their inherent worth.  Our value shines the more we honor others.