Today I am grateful for clearing space. It never ceases to amaze me how much clutter can accumulate in our lives. Between what we physically bring in to what we carry mentally, it all just seems to sneak up as we constantly try to shelve what we feel. Taking the time to make space and clear physically and mentally is so important. I will go for a long period of time feeling like I’m ok or like I can handle what comes my way. Then something will happen and suddenly the world falls apart. In order to prevent that feeling, it’s necessary to take time each day to compartmentalize what you will and will not take in. IT IS OK TO SAY NO. It’s necessary to keep that space.
Today I am grateful continuing clarity. I’ve taken some chances on a few things lately and I’m not sure how they are turning out. For one of them, I’m not completely sure that it’s what I want to do. It pushes me out of my comfort zone and it takes up a lot of time from other things I need to be doing. Yes, there is POTENTIAL for return, but there isn’t any return in the moment and now I have to weigh whether or not I have the capacity to give time in this moment for something that isn’t paying off. The other opportunity I’d really love to dive into because that is a course that will absolutely take me where I need to go. It’s hard to nurture several different limbs at the same time, but I’m grateful to know what will and will not work for me. I’m grateful to create the clarity I need to take the next steps.
Today I am grateful for lessons. Yesterday I had a moment where I freaked out that my husband wasn’t helping me. He was watching his phone while I was running around the house trying to get things organized and cleaned up. I finally lost it because he prioritized watching a clip on a video game over taking care of what we have going on. He asked me, “Why are you so upset that I’m not doing it right now? It’s going to get done.” Now, I am the first to admit that he is right—he had the intention to get it done and he is usually good at following through with things like that. But the issue is that I know if he doesn’t feel like doing something, it won’t get done whether it needs to or not. This wasn’t a time to not help out. So I learned to take perspective of the situation and to think about what was happening and not what I was telling myself.
Today I am SO grateful to move my body. I’m really proud of the progress I’ve been making with taking care of myself. I’ve been waking up early every day this month and I’ve been working out. It feels amazing. The last few weeks I haven’t slept well because my son is having some trouble at night and he’s scared that he won’t find me in the morning. He woke me up twice last night and four times the night before so I was exhausted and I woke up to find him in our bed this morning—apparently I was so tired I didn’t feel him the third time he came in the room. I got up to work out after finding him and he woke up to follow me. I had a moment where I kind of snapped on him and felt the mom guilt. But I got dressed and I went and worked out regardless. As soon as I moved my body a bit, I could feel the pressure dissipate immediately. I’m proud that I kept my response under control and moved myself.
Today I am grateful for options. I’ve been caught in my head for so long that learning to break habits and one of my worst habits is a negative mindset. Like, I immediately freak that the most awful things are going to happen and I constantly allow overwhelm to cloud my thoughts. But I’ve been practicing some mindfulness and with that I’ve learned that the overwhelm I feel is overstimulation. I’m so grateful that I have the ability to work with people and help them and that we can connect—the overwhelm isn’t about taking advantage, it’s about fulfilling my purpose. The options I have mean that I am alive and that I can choose where I spend my energy. That is a BLESSING.
Today I am grateful for ease. We spent a lot of time on the move today, but none of it was rushed or coerced in any way. We simply did what we had to do. We cleaned the yard, we picked up a few things at the store, we spent time together. I made more bread, I worked out and appreciated my body. Finding that rhythm made all the difference in the world. There are some days we are on top of the world and able to handle anything. Other days we stub our toes getting out of the bed. The key is to learn to accept them all.
Wishing everyone a wonderful week ahead.