A little bit of reality after celebrating who we are:  We have to learn when we need to stop the pep talk and simply do the work.  I want to echo what we talked about over the last few days how this is simply about shifting focus.  Instead of spending time doing the things we hate, we need to do what we love/what we want to do.  It can be really scary taking this step because in the beginning we often don’t have a way to transition what supported us to what we love doing and getting the same security we have.  We need to be comfortable going without for a time—going without the extras we thought we needed, going without the habits we adopted that got us to our current position.  Using our energy to create the life we love needs to be nurtured as much as the energy we spent living how we currently do, and that energy needs time and care to grow before it can sustain us.  Once we establish it, it will maintain itself, but we have to allow that to develop so that means taking the time to learn to operate in new ways.

For example, I spent a lot of my life planning, learning, reading, writing out what I wanted to do—but then I didn’t do anything about it.  I had pages and pages, books in fact, about things/dreams I had but I never took action on it.  We don’t get where we want to go by wishing it into reality. We have to plan and align with it to get there.  Yes, having imagination and goals is a wonderful thing but they remain as dreams on a page if we don’t do what it takes to make it happen.  With that being said, I realized I wasn’t taking the time to do what I wanted to do.  There were all of these obligations I thought I had and I felt the world would end if I didn’t do that— and then I went to the other extreme and focused so much on not getting stuck doing things I didn’t want to do that I ended up doing nothing.  I committed to nothing because everything felt like someone else’s goal.  When we do nothing, we get nowhere.  The answer is simple: we need to spend time doing what we want to be doing instead of what we don’t want to and we learn how to make the new way a reality.  Don’t allow ourselves to stagnate where we are by doing the same thing every day—change it up and grow by doing something different. 

Today I am grateful for reminders to do things for others.  I try my hardest to help people as much as I can.  I know I can do more, more specifically if I spent time doing more of what I am meant to do to help people, more people would be impacted.  In the mean time most of my days are spent in “the grind” and doing what I was told to do.  So we recently had my son’s birthday party (late due to time constraints, illness, etc.) and we had a bunch of people over.  While setting up, I could see the excitement and anticipation in my son’s face.  He hasn’t had a proper birthday party since he was 3—again, illness and timing make it difficult—but this year I decided no matter what we were going to do something to celebrate him.  Some of his friends brought over a gigantic inflatable slide and I had nerves the entire time they set it up.  As soon as I saw how much fun those kids were having, I completely relaxed.  My son had a blast and that energy solidified for me that it’s ok to let go and allow, especially in the context of kids being kids.  Especially in the context of providing for friends.  Especially in the context of loving people and allowing them to be who they are.  Sometimes that’s the greatest gift we can give people. It doesn’t take much effort and it makes them feel really good—and that’s a gift.

Today I am grateful for reminders to really listen and take the time to get to know people.  It’s said we have two ears and one mouth so we can listen twice as much as we speak.  Sometimes I have hard time with that because 1. ADD—if I don’t get it out I will forget what I had to say.  2. I have gotten tired of being talked over and ignored.  3. I get nervous and don’t know how to handle silence or break the habit of proving myself to others/controlling the situation.  But there is no denying that when we take the time to hear people, we learn things.  Sometimes about specific subjects but more often about the person.  That’s how connections are made—and we are creatures who need to connect.  People need to be heard and we never know how much they know or how valuable their story can be until we really take the time to hear them.  We also learn how we can help others and where we fit in when we hear people.  On top of that, people are REALLY interesting when you hear them—and they may surprise you.  We can always learn something. 

Today I am grateful to see where people come from.  We had a lot of fun at my son’s party talking about how our relationships began—we’ve all been with our respective partners for over 10 years in most cases so it was fun to look back and see how those relationships began as well as what we were like as individuals when we were younger.  Hearing these stories put so much in perspective about how we are now as well as how our kids are these little reflections of us.  It also brought new light to how we can support each other and seeing “the other” side of people—the real side of what makes them tick, what they enjoy.  All of the idiosyncrasies that bring us together when we thought we were the only ones who felt or did certain things.  There is so much love in that shared story.   It isn’t always easy to form friendships as adults so I am grateful for the opportunity to connect with people.

Today I am grateful to share my ideas.  This stems directly from connecting with people and sharing stories.  I’ve been tossing an idea around for a few months now about the group of moms that all hang out because our kids are in class/have similar interests and activities.  There is a small group of us that really get along and we deal with very similar stressors in our lives and there is a specific level of support that comes from people sharing the same issues.  When you have to work together to bring a different perspective to find a solution, it bonds you in a different way.  Yes, the relationship started because our kids are friends and we connected with each other, but the more we spoke and the conversation expanded, the more we saw we have in common and that included the need for support on things that certain people just don’t understand.  I finally shared my idea with most of the group and it was well received.  So this is something I plan on implementing as soon as I finish getting my house in order.  I’m excited for what that will bring.

Today I am grateful for actively standing my ground.  I found out there was a request pertaining to one of my departments that was done behind my back.  I took a moment to seethe about it because my ego reacted, but then I took the time to approach one of the individuals involved and ask about it.     Conversations like that aren’t always easy but I kept my cool and explained to this individual that I was telling myself a story that didn’t feel good and I wanted to know what was going on.  I could see she was nervous when I asked her the question but the conversation went well—and I felt better.  I still don’t have all the answers because I haven’t spoken with all parties involved, but it helped.  With some reflection, I know I need to ask myself why I feel the need to prove I know my stuff in this regard and why it matters, especially if I know I’m heading in a different direction.  I think it’s ego, but it’s also the insinuation that I don’t know enough to help about my own system which has a greater implication on my professional life.  If I’m going to be an authority anywhere, then I don’t want people putting out the idea that I don’t know my stuff.  But standing up for myself was a good start and I’m proud to have a challenging conversation.

Today I am grateful for loving myself.  There are still days I don’t understand the level of anger/frustration/loathing I had (and sometimes still have) for myself.  I don’t know where this level of perfectionism came from and the idea that if I wasn’t perfect, I wasn’t worth it.  My parents supported me best when I succeeded, but they never put overt pressure on me to do so.  I took that praise on an subconscious level and thought that was the way to get attention.  There are ways to take care of ourselves and hear ourselves out that remind us of wo we are, but like hearing others, we can offer ourselves the same gift and really listen to what our heart and soul tells us.  We just need to take the time to listen.  When we listen and bring our best to the table, and encourage everyone around us to bring their best, we all win.  A boundary is respecting ourselves enough to walk away from a table that serves poison, or keeping people at a distance who would bring something negative to the conversation.  It’s knowing and constantly reminding that we are good as we are, we bring something relevant as we are and accepting it.  I’m grateful to see how I underestimated myself and didn’t explore my talent enough by lack of focus and I’m grateful to see where I need to focus those talents now and share them.  To create my own authority and to be a resource to people.

Wishing everyone a wonderful week ahead.

There were a few moments over the last couple of weeks that I genuinely wanted to give up.  I couldn’t see the answers, I felt discouraged in the steps I was taking, unclear in the decisions, and scared that I was stuck.  I felt frustration with my current 9-5 because I’ve been working on branching out and I don’t seem to be making headway.  I told myself that I was no longer marketable because I didn’t have a specific area of focus that stood out above anyone else.  I’ve been a jack of all trades and my attention is constantly split so there is no definitive growth or expertise in any one area.  I cursed myself for my ADD and my inability to pick an area of focus and I got really upset thinking about my employer for inhibiting that growth because they don’t want me to have a single area of focus.  I had to regroup and recognize this is a story I’m telling myself.  Now, as it applies to the current job market and how we find work/market who we are, yes, this is a detriment.  But when it comes to growth and moving forward, the new story I want to tell myself, these multiple talents and ADD can be highly beneficial.

The new story becomes a tale of taking those multiple talents and creating my own life, the life I want to live.  When we love, accept, and market ourselves instead of letting others tell our story or tell us what we are capable of, the entire universe opens up to us and we get to create it.  It’s still a lot of work, taking all of the talents we have and alchemizing them into our identity, something useful and helpful to the world, but it is authentic work, and we know when we are in flow, it doesn’t really feel like work.  Not all of us are meant to have one area of focus, we are meant to combine our gifts in new ways.  We aren’t meant to sell ourselves on who people think we should be, we are meant to be who we are and bring the people who need our talents to us.  That is how we become magnetic.  It’s a matter of programming the mind and to start cherishing instead of disparaging who we are.  All of our talents are a gift and when we embrace that and work with who we are, we make the complex/multi layered/multi faceted aspects of who we are coherent and easy to understand.  All of the pieces fit together to make a picture that others couldn’t see. 

So for all of us out there who struggle because we aren’t “one thing,” this is to help reframe that.  I was never very good at seeing those Magic Eye things from the 90’s, but I knew the image was there.  So the work of putting these pieces together is a bit like that—we have to learn how to see the picture, and then we have to put it together.  Basically we need to shift the focus.  It isn’t about what we can’t do or how we don’t fit in with what others expect of us—all of that may be true.  But when we shift our energies and understand that we’ve created the opening in the chrysalis, the focus is no longer on breaking the chrysalis—we have to learn how to spread those wings and fly.  See the opportunities around us, trust and celebrate who we are.  Stop downplaying and hating who we are and put the energy to honoring all those pieces of ourselves.  Even the ones we are ashamed of.  Have faith and understand our value is inherent and shed light on that.  Love the creativity and break the box created by the habits we were told to adopt that would make us successful.  When we find what makes us happy and shift that creativity to make the life we love, the rest flows to us.  Fly and don’t ever waste time hating who we are.

“Outwork self doubt and face it til you make it,” Kaylor Betts.  This is a great follow up to our discussion about energy, effort, and flow yesterday.  Our ability to push ourselves depends on where we focus that energy.  Whether we doubt or believe, the energy is spent.  Push ourselves beyond what we think we can do and what we think others will think of us and keep going.  It’s uncomfortable to do something new or to put ourselves out there in a way we haven’t done before.  But the more we do it, the more we face it and practice, that new behavior/belief/environment because second nature to us.  We feel more naturel about it.  Then the learning becomes the doing and the doing becomes the being.  Know we can adapt and adopt new behaviors and beliefs with practice, patience, and persistence.  Shut the noise out, even the noise in our own heads and simply practice our steps or the new behavior with patience and persistence and the results will surprise you every time.  Aim high to hit the mark and you WILL hit it every time.

One of the most challenging things to face is ourselves and to confront our “weaknesses”.  Our mind has the power to stop us in our tracks, every time if we let it so this requires the utmost honesty.  We can’t pretend we don’t waste time, we can’t pretend we don’t let ourselves get distracted, we can’t pretend the world is against us every time.  We need to be able to own our part in it because part of the reason why we feel self-doubt is because we know there is a mismatch in what we say we want and what we are doing, coupled with the fear of doing something we haven’t done before.  Most of us aren’t very good at hearing what is being said whether it’s our inner voice or other people—we are looking to respond or make excuses.  But when we sit face to face with ourselves, not only do we need to get honest about what we are hearing, we need to create space to ACTUALLY hear what is being said. Hear those instincts we ignore so well need to be front and center and we have to be willing to listen better, and that means hearing truths we may not want to hear.  Once we know the truth, the action becomes clearer. 

Listening without action doesn’t do us any good.  We end up in the same spot, making plans but repeating the same day over and over again.  When we face ourselves with honesty, we can come up with a plan because we learn to make the distinction between what we thought we wanted (what we were told we wanted) and what we actually want.  We have to address whether or not we’ve really been putting in the energy toward what we say we want.  We have to look at the amount of time and dedication devoted to what we say we want.  Have we really done all we can do?  This most certainly means getting out of our comfort zone.  Push beyond what we think we know, beyond what we think we can do, push beyond the discomfort with radical honesty, and that is where we come out on the other side, happy, healthy, and whole.  Like I spoke about yesterday from David Goggins, the body will adapt to what the mind tells us.  If we think we can make it, we will make it—and we will find ways to make it.  Get control of our thoughts and we get control of our lives.

“When your mind knows it won’t quit, the body will adapt.  Don’t stop when you’re tired, stop when you’re done,” David Goggins.  I believe I’ve spoken about something similar to this before because there is an innate difference between stopping when the task is finished and stopping when we tell ourselves we need to.  Now, I am not encouraging ignoring the body’s limits in any way—this is where I slightly disagree with Mr. Goggins because there are in fact times when pushing forward is detrimental to both mental and physical health–but I am encouraging an honest evaluation of those limits and whether or not it is the mind telling us to stop or if we reached the point of fatigue/failure on the action.  Being this fresh into the new year we need to learn the key: it isn’t to dive right into new actions that we aren’t adapted to and then giving up because it’s too hard to maintain.  We need to work no honestly meeting ourselves where we are and setting the goal to incrementally move forward without stopping.

In the game of growth and change, development and improvement, the key is to keep moving.  Rest, yes, stopping, no.  The limits we set are internal and can just as easily help us fly or cement us in place if we aren’t honest about what we are doing and where we want to go.  I spent a lot of time offering advice that I didn’t live myself.  I was scared and thought my job was to maintain the life I had until I was able to transition fully into the life I wanted.  Looking at it now I see that I truly didn’t feel worthy of being the person I wanted to be.  I wanted to help people get there but I didn’t know how to follow the steps myself so I stopped working on it.  I see now that I missed out on growing sooner because of the limits I set.  We cut ourselves short when we do things like that.  The truth is we can’t live with one foot on either side of the equation.  We need to fully commit and that is the type of not quitting that ultimately underlies what Goggins is talking about.

We are capable of so much more than we think we are and if we consistently eliminate the negative discussion and question about when we need to stop and about our ability to adopt and adapt the behavior we want, the sooner we are able to fully embrace the life and behaviors we DO want.  Stepping into the energy we want and matching that flow opens up an endless source of movement and effort.  We become unstoppable and tireless when we accept the flow of who we are.  We will always feel tired, like it’s an uphill battle when it comes to doing things not aligned with who we are.  Remember, the effort we put toward tending what we think we should do versus what we want to do is the same but the results are different.  Choose which side needs to be cultivated and put all of our effort toward that.  That’s how we don’t quit, that is how we sustain and maintain the energy to get the results we want.  Adapt to flow and it all gets done.

The most loving people are the most truthful, not the nicest.  Niceness can cover viciousness rooted in fear. When we are devoted to loving ourselves and bridging our humanity with our divinity, we need truth.  We need to be fine being seen as the villain if it means staying true to our hearts.  I spent so much time being what others expected of me because I was raised to put my desires aside and help others at any cost.  I was raised to be a pleaser and to make people happy, to put their needs before mine and to do so in order to be accepted.  The second I stopped giving these people what they wanted/needed, I was no longer of use to them.  I no longer fit in and I was no longer accepted.  Had I been truthful more often, I would have had fewer people around me but I would have had genuine people who stayed.  It was never about quantity, it was about quality and knowing how to remain true to myself. 

I was raised under the idea that we needed to be nice to everyone at all times.  We weren’t supposed to upset anyone.  It was fine if we got angry but we were never supposed to tell anyone about their role in that anger.  Just smile, no one did anything wrong, and keep going about the day.  I felt that resentment pick up and build over the years, never letting go, getting stronger and stronger.  I’d start snapping on people instead of communicating with them.  I’d expect them to see why I was so angry and to take responsibility for it in that moment.  That anger I felt really did make me viscous, I hated everyone and didn’t trust people.  Soon everything other people did became an attack on me and I was a victim of the universe, never getting anything I wanted—and that was when I knew I had to stop that nonsense because even as it was happening, I knew it wasn’t true.  I started thinking about what would happen if I just said what was on my mind instead of being agreeable—it takes practice, it didn’t solve everything, but it abated some of what I felt.    

As we have turned the page on this calendar year, the goal needs to be honesty and holding that type of truth with ourselves.  Yes, it’s nice to be nice and I would never encourage unnecessary mean-ness under the pretense of doing something good.  I do encourage accepting and being honest in the moment.  I do encourage that continued evaluation of the moment and asking what is needed and what good comes of our responses/behaviors.  The goal isn’t to be accepted, it’s to accept ourselves so we need to be able to receive the same truth that we give out—and we need to know how to use it constructively.  What parts to integrate into our lives.  I want to be a loving person and yes, being nice is a part of that, but not if it enables something that ultimately causes harm in the form of complacency or misdirection. Don’t sacrifice our own voices for the sake of someone else’s untruth.  This is the year of being heard and letting go of any fear of being wrong when we know the truth.  Let go of the anger, and simply let the truth out.  As painful as it can be, sometimes the truth is the kindest thing we can provide. 

One of my team mates, Rich Duong, shared a parable during our team meeting the other day about the tools the Devil uses to tend his garden. God has his garden, but the Devil has his as well.  The tools he has are the things designed to bring us down and prevent us from becoming who we are meant to be or from seeing things clearly.  The thing that really caught my ear was the rake of discouragement.  This is said to be the tool the Devil will never give up.  When all other tools in his arsenal fail and an individual keeps pushing forward, the rake of discouragement is the tool that never fails.  This is the tool that stops everyone in their tracks because when we no longer believe in ourselves or our ability to achieve, we stop.  Progress halts and we wallow where we are.  That is the goal of those negative forces: to stop us where we are so we don’t change and we forget our own power, to make it so we don’t share our power to bring progress to the world.   

We need to remember that we are the creator of our own reality.  Don’t believe what is used against us—it’s all perception and we get to choose our beliefs and how we operate here.  Don’t let that voice take us down, we need to remember our self-worth and do what is right for us.  Allow us to take our own power and make our lives easier rather than buying into fear or a system that doesn’t work. The main idea is that we don’t let what is outside influence what we know inside.  Some of the truest advice I have ever heard (even if it took a long time for it to sink in) was that not everything is as it seems.  Pause judgement and belief and interrupt the trained reactions we have when we think we know something.  Even when things seem a bit dark, that is when we need to keep pushing through.  Even if we are tired, keep going and do what we say we are going to do.  That is how we make it happen.  Whether we tend the garden of growth/joy/love/peace or the garden of despair/fear/hate/unrest, the effort is the same—the result is what differs.  Choose the tools we use to cultivate the life we want and step boldly into it with relish and love—we are the only ones who can stop ourselves so don’t let discouragement be the end game.    

I want to follow up on faith for a minute.  I’ve consistently vacillated between being a take charge person and a victim.  The issue I’m seeing with this is an inconsistent faith.  I never trusted enough to allow what I wanted to come to fruition on it’s own.  I couldn’t just take the steps I needed and be patient—I took control and wanted it to happen right away.  I asked for answers and I would ignore them, or I would be so busy moving forward that I didn’t hear them.  The truth is I wanted to have faith, I wanted to be patient, I was just so afraid of missing out on everything, I was afraid that if I wasn’t the best in everything that I would get nothing, that I didn’t know how to find who I was.  I didn’t know how to sit still and listen to hear the next steps.  My own inner monologue was so loud and so engrained in victimhood because of how people treated me (and the beliefs I started to adopt about myself because of how they treated me) that I didn’t know how to shut up and hear a different tale.  The answers were always there, I just didn’t hear them or I told myself I didn’t know how to act on them. 

In my heart, I actually do believe and feel that I will be ok—that all will be ok.  I’ve been so scared to fall in with my faith and just believe that I’ve continually tried to control the outcomes.  At the same time, I legitimately believe in the magic of source and the universe and that it puts all together.  I need to have patience and believe.  Right nowt he steps are taking care of myself and letting go of what isn’t working.  Changing my behaviors and thoughts isn’t like a light switch.  I need to take the small steps every day to make that transition.  With small steps and practice the faith will come more naturally and I will feel guidance—and be able to understand it.  I’ve known for a long time that I have a story to share and that it will help people—I’ve just been wrestling with ego and the potential fall out from what I have to tell people.  I know once I share that work, everything will fall into place.

Tabitha Brown shared the story of her viral Whole Foods video from 6 years ago and I got chills because it demonstrated the true faith that I’m talking about here.  She explained that she had gone back to that Whole Foods to thank the young man who made the sandwich and that he was no where to be found and no one seemed to know who he was.  My immediate thought was this was an angel sent here to put her on the path to sharing the message she had.  How else would he disappear?  I’ve heard faith stories about things like this before and it sounded just like the work of source to send someone to help us on our way when we are doing our work.  I believe that as long as we are patient and aware, we all have an angel that works in our favor like that.  We just need to trust and do what we are being asked to do even if it doesn’t make sense. So, another goal I have this year is to lean into my faith more.  It’s hard for me, but if I am going to be softer and open to what I am asked to do, open to releasing what doesn’t serve, I need to let go of control and embrace trust.  I am not a victim, I am being guided—just as we all are.  Have faith—we are always encouraged to keep going. 

Today I am grateful for intuition.  This week has been remarkable.  It started off with a bang, tons of chaos at work, dealing with bills, dealing with the energy of other people around me.  But in all the chaos and energy, in all of the frustration and anger I felt, I definitely felt most alive and authentic.  The words I said in the heat of frustration were true—while the delivery was emotional, my emotion wasn’t in it, it was the emotion behind truth. Not to be conceited, but the things I said could not be disputed or refuted in any way.  I FELT it.  I felt all of the things I needed to be doing  including what I need to focus on, how I want to feel, where I want to transition, what I need to do next, and what this upcoming year will look like.  Certain parts are still a bit fuzzy (like the how and the when for some of it) but it doesn’t change the feeling—I know it.  I woke up on Thursday immediately thinking about gratitude but didn’t do it immediately because I had JUST done it before bed (like written it down less than 6 hours before) and then as I walked down the stairs I thought about how I need to move my body again.  I drew my cards and two were about appreciation, one was about focusing energy, and the last one was about movement.  Don’t EVER discount intuition.  I know at times it may feel like being pulled in a million directions or the intuition conflicts with something, but learning to read what the mind is saying and feel what we need clarifies all of that.  Intuition is real.

Today I am grateful for people who want to support me.  I’ve been a person who always does it on my own, always shows up when I need to (early, even), who tries to make people want me there, and who wants to reciprocate so I don’t owe anyone anything.  All of that has gotten me where I am today.  But I’ve noticed more and more that I feel awkward accepting help or that I feel indebted.  At the same time, I know the things I’ve been helped with have been immensely relieving.  I also know that the help I’ve received has pushed me forward.  I’ve been seeing that the timing has been right for each of these scenarios.  I’ve also noticed that as soon as I thank the person who has helped me (instead of trying to deny the assistance) I’ve felt much better.  I’ve accepted the help and in some ways that’s like accepting myself.  I may not be able to reciprocate in the exact manner they helped me, but I know that I can return the energy in my own way—and that’s really what matters.  The energy exchange and the intention behind it.  Instead of feeling guilty or obligated when we receive help, be grateful and be on the lookout for how we can assist next time.  It’s that easy.

Today I am grateful for expressing myself.  I’m struggling with a very close partnership (or what is supposed to be a partnership) that is on the verge of failing.  We’ve been in this semi-partnership for years and we tend to work against each other even when we don’t mean to.  We both have repressed thoughts and feelings and needs that we are working to discover, express, and meet for ourselves and each other.  But as I hosted an event over the weekend, this person literally wasn’t in the room.  They watched their vlog, sat upstairs away from the group, and walked away after all was said and done.  I didn’t argue with this individual, after everyone left, I told them that I had really needed them and when I asked what was wrong, they said they just weren’t feeling it.  Instead of yelling, I asked if I had ever left them high and dry like that.  They immediately said no.  It didn’t turn into an argument. They said they understood (but we will see), but this would have been something I got dramatic about and fought about for hours.  We had a 10 minute conversation, I said my piece, and that was it. 

Today I am grateful for finally standing my ground.  I’ve had several conversations over the last couple of weeks where I’ve been repeatedly informed I’m wrong about a lot of things—various things, every day things, inconsequential things—but it’s been a constant nagging about all of the areas that I’ve been incorrect.  Yes, I know this sounds like an ego thing but this became more of a mental issue for me.  I’ve been very candid about my struggles with short term memory—but my long term and my retention of facts has been pretty solid.  When people start questioning those areas, I do get a little extra sensitive.  These are environments where I shouldn’t have to prove myself—areas where I’ve had the experience and I’m familiar.  I am the first to concede when I’m wrong—I’m tired of having to always be wrong.  I finally stood up and maintained what I knew over two incidents this past weekend—and I was right.  This isn’t a tally system, but this was a way for me to tell this individual that I have a strong knowledge base too, let’s focus on something we can do together.  I’m not here to appease or be nice, I’m here to be collaborative and cooperative.  We both have ideas to share.

Today I am grateful for moving forward.  We’ve officially ended our holiday season—I mentioned last week that we were delayed due to illness in the family.  I have to admit that I am so grateful to still host and have the family around that we have.  But I’d be remiss if I said I wasn’t anxious to move forward and put focus and work toward plans for this year.  I’m ready to turn a new leaf and welcome new experiences.  There is progress to make this year and I feel the heightened energy to make it happen.  I can’t see where it will go, but I know it’s something I need to do.  I’m ready to cleanse, clear, and move forward.  Cleansing being the operative word in this moment. 

Wishing everyone a wonderful week ahead.   

Just because you fall, the earth isn’t going to move.  You just have to get up, even if you’re bruised, you get up and keep going.  Falling isn’t failure—it’s only failure if you give up on your goal.  This last month has been beautifully chaotic.  Beautiful because of the experiences I’ve had and the people around me, but chaotic because it has been busier than normal—there were several times I felt like I was going to drown.  Then people started getting sick and things simply weren’t going to pan out how we all wanted them to.  That chaos has distracted me and I’ve allowed myself to nearly get derailed from my goals because the vision wasn’t clear.  I thought I had failed in so many areas and I realized that not only were my goals not very specific, but the goals I did have weren’t a primary focus.  Bishoi Khella talks about how we feel inspired and then lose that inspiration when we don’t keep the goal at the forefront of our minds.  Look, life happens to us all and it’s not uncommon to have plans derailed or plans changed in the middle of a journey.  We just have to keep going.

We all fall sometimes—and we are taught when we are babies that when we fall we must get back up.  That’s a lesson we need to continue throughout our lives. As babies learning to walk we celebrate the attempts and encourage each other to keep going no matter how many times we fall.  As adults we need to remember to shift our perspective and encourage the attempts we’ve made so that we can continue to get up and move forward.  It isn’t the end of the world, it’s simply a moment.  Keep our priorities and goals at the forefront of our minds so that way little stumbles don’t even matter.  Focus on where we are going and the steps in front of us-life happens for us, not to us, so if we want to get where we want to be, we can’t let those hiccups stop us.  As we approach the end of the year there will be a lot of talk about setting goals and what we want the next year to look like.  Instead of being general or doing what we’ve always done, take the time to get really specific, get really honest, and get really focused.  Pick some small steps that can work toward the broader vision of the goal instead of trying to eat the whole whale and make sure that sail is pointed to catch the wind in the right direction. 

As painful as a fall may be, the truth is we can take it.  We can’t let a bruised ego derail a big dream.  We can’t let the noise or the demands of other people deter us from where we are going.  And we can’t let a little bump in the road stop us.  We are designed to move forward, we are designed to do the work.  We just need to put aside the fear of what others think of us.  We need to be willing to change what we know doesn’t work for us and we have to be willing to do things a different way if we see it isn’t working.  We have to be willing to endure the pain of an honest evaluation of ourselves and look at how we align what we say we want with what we do to get it.  We have to be our own loudest cheerleader and support.  We need to be willing to walk away from habits, patterns, thoughts, behaviors, and the egoic traits that keep us where we were.  We need to be willing to give up what we knew for the dream and hope of something bigger.  As long as we can do that, there is no failure.  Accept our blessings with gratitude and clarity and move forward.  Keep going.