“You know some people think that the truth can be hidden with a little decoration, a little coverup and avoidance.  But as time goes by, the truth is always revealed.  What is fake fades away.  And not for nothing, who wants to live with that amount of guilt hiding the truth?  That sounds horrible.  The truth really will set you free,” Erica Russo. Sometimes we don’t realize the extent all those little things, the stories we’ve told pile up.  Even those things we spin with the best of intentions can create problems in the long run.  And Russo is right, no matter what we do, it will come to light.  We even lie to ourselves, only sharing certain parts of our lives or certain versions of ourselves with specific people.  That chameleon act is dangerous as well.  In the grand scheme of things, I’m sure Russo was referencing the big lies that we use to hide behind, but it’s those little things we do that open the door to the things we need to hide behind.  No amount of cover up can erase it, we always carry it with us and it can fester if we don’t address it appropriately.

We can’t change what we do and I will be the first to admit how hard it is to come to terms with some of the things I’ve done—so I know it’s tempting to hide things for fear of how people will see us.  The reality is if we hide what we’ve done then it’s all the worse when people have to find it for themselves.  It’s a heavy weight to carry, the creation of a story, the manipulation of a narrative we spin to make things look not so bad or like we aren’t really at fault/involved.  The lie becomes a chain, an anchor we always have to remember so we can continue to play our part.  It’s much easier to relay the real story than it is to remember the parts we created.  Upkeep is a lot of work, especially on something with a rocky foundation.  Sometimes the truth is as simple as we’ve been telling ourselves the wrong story.  We’ve been believing the wrong things about ourselves.  We’ve created an image and a label based on our own interpretation and fear of something we’ve done and it doesn’t align with who we really are. 

Honesty must start with ourselves and being honest about who we are.  That can be tricky for the people-pleasing chameleons who just want to keep people happy, who seem like they’re placating because they resonate with part of what someone says so their agreement makes them look complicit on one hand and untruthful on the other.  Those people are at most risk of losing who they are because all they have are their masks.  But as Russo said, all that is fake fades away, so wearing that mask will eventually not offer the protection we think it has.  So as we continue our journey forward this year, this is another step in our process—revealing and facing what was hidden.  There are so many degrees of “hard” as we’ve spoken about before and we can choose our “hard” whether that’s hiding or telling the truth.  The difference is only one will allow us to be fully who we are and unlocks our fullest potential. Only one keeps us free to move in both thought and action.  Only one sets us up for success.  Spend time creating the life we want instead of the projection/imitation of what we want people to think we are.  With grace and honesty, we will see all we want to.