While lunching with some friends this past weekend, one of them made a comment to the effect they don’t spend time with people who make them uncomfortable.  She explained the course of her week and how busy it was which left her with Saturdays.  “Saturdays are precious to me,” she said, “I won’t spend time with someone who makes me uncomfortable.”  I loved it when she said it because it was a reminder of the choice on how we spend our energy.  We have the choice in what we do and who we allow into our live.  We have a say in who influences our energy and that means we have a say in who we allow in our sphere.  How we spend our time is completely within our control.  When we know what matters to us it makes those choices easy.  We don’t bother with what doesn’t serve.

There was a time I thought that was a cold way to live because it seemed too cut throat.  I wanted to be liked and I figured people wanted to be liked as well so I left a part of myself open even when I knew I shouldn’t have.  In those moments I felt incredibly raw because people weren’t as open with me, they weren’t as careful with me as I was with them.  And that made me need to shift how I saw it.  Being selective isn’t cold—it’s necessary.  That doesn’t mean we need to build walls, it just means we need to be careful with our energy.  So when we see time as precious, our energy is precious as well.  When we start making better choices about our use of time, it becomes easier and easier to recognize what we are willing to take into our lives—what matters.