Stop Stopping ourselves.  There is an exercise we all need to do at some point in our lives if we are ever going to truly…experience life, I guess. We have to look at ourselves.  Truly look at ourselves.  More importantly we need to be honest.  Know who we are. Understand our actions.  The type of things we do and ask whether it matches the type of person we want to be.  This isn’t easy.  I was never afraid of being honest, but I’m not sure I understood how far the brain would go to protect us from ourselves, to cling to the patterns, to justify/excuse what we did and didn’t do.  We follow patterns from the time we are young, learning what we see and then emulating it and if we don’t go outside of our environment, we won’t know any different.  When we repeatedly find ourselves at a certain point, a wall, we have to ask what we are doing that keeps us there, how do we keep coming back to that point?  Did we ever leave it? 

The point is acceptance of what we have done, that we have participated in stopping our own progress.  I listened to a reel today discussing turning 40 and the shift in hormones this person was experiencing.  She had been feeling off and knew something wasn’t right and she went and got tested.  She got some answers and is working toward them and the point is this: we have to live how is right for us and we have to trust our instincts.  Even if advocacy hasn’t worked before, we know the truth about who we are.  We are worthy of living the life we want.  So if I want to be healthy and have a home that I run in a way that feels more comfortable to me, more in line with who I am, then that’s what I need to do.  Like, if I know dairy bothers me or I’m sensitive to sugar, then it’s ok to not have those things in my house even if other people do.  We need to do what is right for ourselves and our families.  We don’t need to give into peer pressure, we just need to do what is right for us.  Why do I limit my growth and my health for the sake of what someone else thinks? 

And if I know what I need, then why do I keep doing the things that bring me back to where I don’t want to be?  For example, I know that I want to do something different with my career, I am working on multiple avenues for other options—but why do I continue to plan my life around the work that I don’t enjoy?  Why do I prioritize that work and hate myself for not doing what I want every day?  I could take some time off and really focus on the things I enjoy, take that full leap and just do it. But something stops me and that is what I need to figure out. What is THAT thing that stops me?  It’s not like I don’t want to do the things I’m craving and have been talking about for years.  I DO.  So why don’t I becomes the question? Is it lack of self-worth that I don’t deserve to create that level of joy in my life?  Is it fear that I can’t maintain it?  Is it that I’m not sure what to do first in order to make it a viable thing?  Maybe it’s all of it.  But the point is I have realized one thing: the only thing stopping me at this juncture is myself and not knowing what I need to do next. It’s me.   And if it’s me holding myself back, then it’s me who can unleash the full breadth of my talent and purpose on the world as well.