“Change is hard but staying in the places you’ve outgrown is destroying you.  It’s making you not trust yourself.  The truth is the magic happens when you stop shrinking into places you no longer fit—you’re bigger than that,” JB Copeland.  Oh how we make ourselves adapt and change and play the game instead of calling the shots ourselves.  We are inherently creative and that isn’t meant to be caged.  Guided and developed, yes, but not altered for consumption. The change I spoke of yesterday is the deepest level of unbecoming that we can think of.  Most people aren’t able to handle full expression because we have attached so much and so many different meanings to how we are supposed to act and interpreting behavior rather than outright asking what someone meant by something.  We are so jaded with self-importance to a degree that we expect everyone to know everything we mean anytime we say it. We’ve allowed ourselves to believe that just because we have the ability to share our thoughts at all times that we need to—and that people will understand everything we say from our frame of reference. The human mind doesn’t work like that.

The opposite is true as well—trying so hard to put ourselves in a box that we lose who we are in favor of appeasing others.  When we cage ourselves into the definition others have of us we lose all creative space.  Here’s the thing, the stuff we tell ourselves we do out of necessity becomes a cage as well.  I’m guilty of it too.  I adore my home, I love this life I’ve created but I really struggle with my 9-5 but I absolutely need that work if I’m going to continue to live in this home with this lifestyle.  Can I make changes that feel like a better fit?  Of course, but there is the risk of losing the pieces that I really like as well.  The trick is to discern between what is serving and what isn’t—and that requires knowing what we’re going for and who we are.  One lesson I’ve learned is that staying where we are if we have a desire for something else absolutely sucks.  We waste time doing the things we think we need to do to maintain something that isn’t fully us.  I can attest to that.  It’s only recently that I’ve understood what it means to let go of how we defined ourselves.  I thought I needed to have an entirely new version, a new person in place in order for me to move on, but the truth is change is a gradual thing.  Not to say there aren’t life-changing events, but more often it’s the little things we do on a daily basis that have the biggest impact.

So when we wake up and we don’t feel like the life we’ve created fits, when we get the urge to do something different—do it.  I’ve had issues getting up and ready for work the last couple of weeks to the point where I have actually ended up leaving the house late.  Like I’m creating unnecessary stress and scrambling because I can’t get myself moving toward what I used to do.  It used to be no issue to see the time and just stop what I’ve been doing and get ready for the day.  Now, it’s harder and harder to pull away.  I’d be lying if I said the vision is 100% clear because there are still a lot of factors at play here, factors that don’t involve just me.  But I am well aware of what I am able to do and I am taking more time to do the things that make sense for me and my family.  I know the little things that we’ve been working on are difficult but it’s more of a discomfort.  We can get past discomfort.  We can’t get past missed time to do and be who we are.  If we know something isn’t working or doesn’t feel right, then we need to make different decisions and undertake the change that will get us where we want to be.