Right after I saw the quote above I had an experience that shows the importance of doing and deciding—and understanding who is for you and who is against you.  I recently shared about a developing relationship with some newer friends and how we had been given the wrong impression of them from some other people in the neighborhood.  The more we spoke with these people, the more we realized we have in common, and we can have a good time together—and actually do have a good time with mutual reciprocity and discussion and conversation.  We were together a few nights ago (the friends who had been speaking ill of this group was also over there) and I was having a conversation with my friend’s husband about focusing on health and understanding where some of our health problems come from.  He mentioned wanting to make changes and to find the origin of some of his issues so he spoke about a specific blood panel and test and how he followed a person who had this specific test and turned his life around.  As soon as he started talking about that person, I knew 100% who he was referencing about the test—it was the mortality scientist/health and wellness expert we use in our side business.  As I’m explaining this to my friend/neighbor, he’s asking me questions and I told him to come and see the products we have that can help him get on track, this stuff is legitimate.  Right then the friend (who had previously been talking crap about this group) piped up with, “Yeah but the problem with your products is…”

I immediately cut her off and said, “There is no problem with my products, not everyone has the same body you do.”  This was the third time she has interfered with my work, with something that matters to me, with something that will help me help others.  She tried to continue her statement, talking about the ingredients in my products and I told the group we have the purest grade products sourced with permission from their indigenous locations and we are tested no less than two times, creating additional standards beyond what the FDA says we need to.  She then began looking for things online, acting like she knew what to use for what and the conversation fizzled.  I’m not hopeless with our other friends because they have both expressed a desire to get healthy and now that there is this direct connection with someone they were already interested in, I know we can have the conversation and find a way to help with what they are looking to accomplish.  Now, the same friend who started speaking ill of my products started talking to our other friend and she offered to connect her with some of the local chambers for advertising purposes—this is the second time she has offered to assist with someone’s business in that way.  Yes, she brought us the contact for the market and I am grateful, but she interfered at the market as well and disregards my work as a real business.  For a while it led me to believe that there was no market for me out here when there was no market for me with the people she would reference.

When people show their true colors like that, believe them.  It’s been a pattern and I can’t ignore it any longer.  This isn’t a healthy relationship and, while there were some good times and there was care in there somewhere, it was always conditional.  It was always about fulfilling their needs, doing what they needed, attending their wants/needs.  That isn’t to say certain things weren’t reciprocated—they were.  But that came at a cost of being available at any time anywhere for whatever they wanted to do.  It’s fine to attend to our friends as long as it is a reciprocal, as long as it’s mutually supportive.  I would never recommend another business in the same field as theirs, especially right in front of them.  Why would she suggest something else or try to dispute the reputability of my products to other people right in front of me?  It’s one thing if you have an issue with me personally, but do not create an issue for me professionally as well.  That isn’t a friend, that is someone threatened by what I’m doing.  We need to remember that we are the only ones who can make our dreams come true and even if the people around us don’t really support us, we still need to support ourselves.  Their opinion doesn’t matter and if they aren’t there for you the same way you are for them, if they actively undercut you, then it’s time to face the truth and let them walk away while we walk on and create our lives.