“When you command the universe for change, don’t flinch as the old world shatters to dust beneath your feet,” Wild Woman Sisterhood.  I like this little reminder as continued encouragement from yesterday.  As someone who has spent a majority of life trying to keep everything under control and making it appear a certain way, as someone who frequently fell apart at the slightest inconvenience, I can attest that I wanted things to change without changing.  I can also confirm that I felt that anything that fell apart was a personal attack and a direct reflection of my worth and ability.  I was never taught that sometimes the old has to fall apart to make way for the new.  I read Billy Crystal’s “700 Sundays” (the book the show was based on—I wrote about that a while ago) and there is reference to Zutty Singleton about the rose—how sometimes, even as beautiful as the flower is, we need to cut it back to make way for something even more.  I struggled with that because I have an intense appreciation for the bloom of what got me here.  How do I let go of what is perfectly good in order to get something else?  Can’t we just expand?

But as I’ve gotten older I’ve learned that we simply can’t bear the weight of all of it.  We can’t have the life we used to have and a new one—we aren’t designed to carry both.  The brain can’t live in two worlds at once.  And the fact that we can’t hold it doesn’t indicate we are weak.  We have to learn that when things break it isn’t because we have failed or that we are incapable.  It’s because we are so strong that the old ways can’t hold us.  We are evolving and developing to a new level.  Destruction is terrifying but it is also a good sign.  When we clear the landscape, we have room to build anew.  We can always appreciate what was and what got us to where we are—but that is what served as a foundation for us, not a permanent residence.  If we decide we want something new and suddenly all we knew is falling apart, take heart.  The universe is showing us our power and how it responds to what we want.  Appreciate it because we wouldn’t get what didn’t align.  It’s not as if things will empty to never fill again.  No, we are clearing space to bring in what we are meant to have.  To serve a bigger purpose. Embrace the change.