Thoughts flows through me at top speeds all the time and I find myself trying to cling onto a thought just to see it through somehow. I struggle to understand them at times, or even to hear what they really are. Sometimes I only catch pieces of them and they don’t quite make as much sense when I try to bring them into the world as they did when they still rested in my head.  I cursed this for a long time because I couldn’t make heads or tails of the images, thoughts, ideas, running rampant—and run rampant they did.  It felt completely out of control because it was like I had no say in the ideas that popped in, when they popped in, or even remembering them when I really needed them.  I felt like I couldn’t rely on my brain.

As I was working on too many projects at one time in a state of panic that I wouldn’t be able to see anything through, it suddenly hit me: The millions of thoughts that run through my mind are a blessing.  For a long time it felt almost manic, the surge, the flow of different ideas.  I fought for a long time to choose which ones I wanted to hang onto, which ones were mine, which ones had merit, etc.  Then it became a matter of which ones even made sense for what I was working on at the time.  But if I didn’t have that level of activity in my brain, I’m not sure what I would look like.  Yes, it is challenging to navigate that level of stimulation, but how lucky to feel that level of creativity?! 

There was a time I know the thoughts were not healthy on any level.  They were destructive and painful and repetitive to the point of obsession.  As soon as I worked through the first layer of that trap, I found that the flow of thoughts could change—and did change—based on what I chose to focus on.  No, I wasn’t always zeroed in how I should have been, but the thoughts didn’t have me in a choke hold of fear and negativity.  There was some light there.  That’s when the creativity really came through.  What could I do with those thoughts?  What were they really trying to tell me or what were they really trying to express?  If you have an overactive mind, consider that there’s something else there.  There’s an activity in your brain that’s trying to get out.  There is something trying to come through that is meant for you to share, perhaps even feel your way through.  When it truly gets dark, reach out.  Find someone or something you can rely on to feel better.  But if the thoughts are simply running around, try to follow one.  Try something new like writing it down, or painting, or running, or building something.  See what comes of it.  Chances are the “crazy” you feel is some type of creativity bursting at the seams.  Give it a chance and see.