Stagnation

Photo by Nina Quka on Pexels.com

Someone told me, “Whenever your life is feeling stagnant or as if nothing is happening, that means you’re being given the time and space to heal and release the baggage that you cannot carry to where you’re meant to go soon,” via beingawoke. Healing is a doozy.  It is vulnerable work and time consuming.  And to do it right, it exposes the parts of us we either keep hidden or protected.  Healing and releasing for the sake of moving forward means letting go of what we carried as an identifier and stepping into who we are.  Healing looks different for everyone whether it is ending a relationship or habit or changing a way of being that we are used to. 

I personally always felt frustration with stagnation.  I wanted to do as much as I could and that goes to the speed my mind operates (more to come on that tomorrow).  I couldn’t handle sitting still and I certainly couldn’t handle waiting for the results to come when I put in all the effort and wasn’t seeing any fruit.  I interpreted that as not doing enough.  I had no concept of patience, I merely wanted the reward—they say the fruit is always the last thing to bloom on the tree but I expected it when I wanted it, not when it was ready. Regardless, I’ve told you the stories of how I’ve repeated the same day for a long time, thinking it was getting me somewhere only to continue the same pattern day after day.  Sometimes those patterns aren’t ours.

Sometimes those patterns and the healing work we are supposed to do comes from someone else.  For me, I remembered my grandmother talking about my great grandmother and her anxieties related to illness and disease.  I knew exactly what my grandmother had described because I do that myself: I exaggerate and fixate and automatically go to worst-case scenario in my head.  That is something that needs to be healed after carrying it for over 100 years in the family—that we know of. The patterns we learn about our worth and our place and the things we are supposed to do also need to be released.  There comes a time when we have to find who we are on our own.

Part of that healing is learning to actually slow down in the slow times.  As the quote says, we are being given space to heal and release the baggage we can’t carry to where we are going.  When you have a busy mind, you can physically slow down easier than you can mentally.  But that is the trick.  You have to learn to be ok with shutting off every now and then.  The operating system isn’t designed to go at peak level forever.  It needs to heal, pause, reboot, and reset.  The only way to do that is to accept the lessons in the slow time.  Stop looking for activity when rest and healing are what you need. Stop looking for distraction from what is really going on.  Get ready to level up by being who you are.  Allow.

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