Theif

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“Procrastination is a thief of time,” Loren Ridinger.  This is about accountability and getting really honest with who we are.  How much time is wasted on the unnecessary in our lives?  How much time do we spend complaining about what needs to be done when we could just do it?  How much time do we spend doubting our own ability and sitting on what we are meant to share with the world when we could simply DO something?  All of that is procrastination.  The other day I felt amazing—not that everything went great, but the emotion was out of it and I did what I needed to do.  Right when I went to sleep, the asshole voice in my head decided to play the, “You’re getting so old, you have no future, you’ve accomplished nothing,” card.  This followed up with the, “You’ve got nothing of value to share,” card. 

This is not new for me.  Years of my life were dedicated to believing that voice.  They were spent in a weird combination of believing I was crap and had nothing to offer while simultaneously believing someone would always take care of me.  That voice is a complete fucking liar.  That voice is predicated on old beliefs and old systems that determined our worth through what we generated.  The human is not a machine and the brain does indicate wear when it’s pushed too far.  It’s our job to maintain this vessel and to do the maintenance on the software.  What we feed ourselves mentally has a huge impact on what we do.  I spent years in a defunct mental state, paralyzed by my own insecurity and indecision and inability to connect with that source. 

I believe we are all meant for greatness in our lives—but our definition of greatness is a little skewed.  We can’t judge the impact we have on other people by the material return we have.  Greatness is determined by the quality we bring to someone else’s life.  It can be the small moments, the quiet word of advice, the encouragement to keep moving forward.  It is the giving of something we have to help another person.  THAT is greatness.  Just because we don’t have a certain dollar amount in the bank account or a certain house, it doesn’t mean anything.  How well we love and care for others and how we spend our time THAT is where the meat is.

I spent years feeling like a failure because I made some really bad decisions in my day.  I felt like a failure because I couldn’t quite get to where I wanted to be whether I stayed the course or tried my own thing.  It felt like I was destined to accomplish nothing.  And then it hit me: my accomplishments aren’t about what I get in return.  It’s about what I’m sharing with others.  An accomplishment is putting a smile on someone else’s face today.  An accomplishment is allowing others the freedom to live their lives and feel supported.  I don’t need to sit and wait for permission to do that.  I don’t need to feel a certain way about myself in order to take action on what I’m meant to do. 

And that is the key.  In order to fulfill our contracts here, we must act.  If you don’t know what to do, do something.  The answers always come from action.  One of my favorite quotes is from Marie Forleo, and she says, “Clarity comes from engagement, not thought.”  So pick something.  There will never be a right time.  There will never be a perfect moment or a perfect anything, really.  So just do.  Take a step.  You might fall but you’ll either learn to pick yourself up again or you’ll fly.  Don’t waste your life away wishing for something else.  Just DO.  Sometimes you aren’t meant to find your purpose because it’s meant to find you.  All of the work that comes along the way is just building you up to what you’re meant to do.  Just DO.

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