Practice, Practice

Photo by Chinmay Singh on

I’ve been given the chance to really practice letting go.  There are so many days that I’m at odds with someone very close to me. They have a tendency to bulldoze my feelings and not take into account how their actions impact me.  They are absolutely a do it and ask for forgiveness later type of person.  That type of behavior works well in some circumstances and it even attracted me to this person.  They never let the opinions of others stop them which is honestly an admirable quality to have. The only issue with this is when it goes on too long and the time for cooperation is needed.

But I want to highlight the main point here which is that people will do what is good for them—and we have no say on that.  We have no say in how people behave or how they react.  All we can do is what works.  But when it comes to practice and having a relationship with someone, we have to learn what works for each other.  And there are some things you have to learn to stop.  You have to just let it go.  Even if it feels uncomfortable, you can decide if you are going to keep running the same circle over and over again or if you are going to try and up your game.  You can either ignore it and do what works for you or you can disengage. 

I’ve been really sensitive about my space lately—it gets overwhelming when you become the repository for everyone else.  It’s frustrating when you have a space that is your own and still feel you have no say in what happens there.  But there is something you do when you make space for the people in your life.  There are things you learn to compromise on.  I’m learning where I have to stop controlling and start stepping into who I am and where I need to stand my ground.  I’m also learning which boundaries I need to keep and where I can be a little flexible.  The latter portion means allowing myself to learn about the preconceived notions I’ve had about things. 

So with letting go, it’s a balancing act.  I’m grateful to learn about my boundaries and what is good for me.  I’m grateful to see the people around me for who they really are.  I’m grateful for the help I’ve been given.  I’m even grateful for the discomfort because it directs me to where I need to be.  It reminds where I need to develop and step up as well as when I’ve gotten off track.  If something doesn’t feel right, it’s a sign that we need to pivot.  I have always allowed others space for who they are and I expect the same thing.  But I know I also need to allow.  So I’m doing my best to ALLOW.

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