When we teach ourselves bad habits, including negative self-talk, it can take a long time to break that habit. We have to convince our minds that the things we tell ourselves, things that we have often repeated on auto-pilot for years, are in fact, not true. That we have been lying to ourselves. We are all worthy of feeling good. It can take our minds a little while to transition to the mindset that we have power to choose to feel good—and to accept that it is ok. Once you do, you never want to go back.
I had a conversation with a co-worker today about the distracted brain and she mentioned something she had read stating, “Our ancient minds can’t keep up with modern technology.” (Gazzaly/Rosen). Without going into detail with the discussion, I took the comment at face value. At first I agreed, fully believing that we are too distracted for our own good and that we don’t multi-task nearly as well as we think we do. Then I agreed on the premise that we move too fast in general without understanding what we are doing. As we continued to discuss, another thought popped into my head: it’s not our minds that are the problem, it’s the patterns we allow to continue. So in essence, it is our ancient HABITS that keep up with change.
I thought about how many people have told me something along the lines of, “It’s how we’ve always done it” when I come in to make changes to processes. We allow ourselves to be stuck because we find comfort in routine and consistency. In order for us to move forward we need to teach ourselves new habits, new patterns. And as time continues to pass, we need to develop those and let them evolve as well. We are in a constant state of growth and we pretend that we are content sitting behind a desk for 8 hours a day. We are not built for that.
On a larger scale, the world is evolving. How we did things isn’t how we have to continue. We are on the precipice of making a choice for the future based on propriety (how we’ve always done things) or creativity (looking at new options). Personally, I choose the latter. I admit I enjoy my comfort and I stand on tradition. Nostalgia, however, is not a reason to let stagnant beliefs or customs continue. Our world needs our help more than ever and we can’t presume to find innovative solutions if we are stuck on our laurels for no other reason than that is what we know.
In order for anything to thrive we must adapt. That means we have to allow our mindsets to adapt as well. We have to accept that what we have taught ourselves isn’t necessarily right and that we can change. It is all a matter of choice. You wouldn’t willingly choose to leave your car stuck in the mud, right? So why do you allow yourself to muddy your creative, beautiful, free mind with negative thoughts? This behavior needs a new pattern. As I continue my own practice of self-discovery and self-love, I know it’s a matter of consistency and repetition of new thoughts aligned with the person I want to be.
Accepting my own worth has allowed me to express myself in ways I never thought possible. I have found parts of me I repressed and suppressed for years because I didn’t think the path I wanted to take was an option let alone possible. Yes, I have to constantly remind myself and it’s easy to slip back into negative thoughts, but it is much easier to get myself back on track as I take the time to remind myself of my worth every day. Instead of thinking of all of the ways that it isn’t going to work for me, I remind myself that things take time and that there is so much I want to learn. I want to develop my skills and share with the world. It’s in doing what is right for ourselves and in sharing our gifts that we flourish.