“Your excuses just gave someone else an opportunity,” Via entrepreneurship quote. I’ve spoken candidly about my misguided expectation that others would fulfill my desires if I focused on theirs. I know I’m not alone in this whether it is something you were taught or something you picked up along the way as a survival mechanism. When we come from that place, whether we are the ones fulfilling someone else’s desires or not, we are saying to the universe that the opportunity isn’t for us. The universe responds and moves on. That isn’t to say that the opportunity won’t present itself again—what is for us comes to us as it is meant to at the right time—but we delay and deny that moment by turning it down.
We are also trained to fear success and to fear when something good happens to us. Brene Brown calls that a foreboding joy, where when something good happens, we believe something bad will happen as well. Like it’s too good to be true. Maybe it’s some primal part of the brain to be suspicious of good things. I think it’s also a bit like a drug. When things start going well, when they are flowing as a result of alignment, it feels a bit disorienting. We are trained to expect the worst, so we don’t react well when things are on the up. If we can anticipate the negative and boldly proclaim, “I knew it!” if something goes wrong, then there is no reason we can’t train ourselves to react the same way for something positive.
The majority of humans are also notoriously self-deprecating and have a skewed view of themselves. We think believing in ourselves is arrogance or that we can’t be successful if we aren’t supported by all people along the way. If we waited until we had the world’s permission and belief in us, we would be sitting still forever. Stop denying yourself the opportunity because you don’t think you can do it. Deep down you know you can. The universe knows you can. I can guarantee there are people in infinitely worse situations than you who have made it work. It’s a matter of leveraging what is given to you and sharpening the skills that need work.
One topic I’ve also mentioned a few times is that if you have the idea, it is meant for you. So many amazing things start in this world because someone says, “wouldn’t it be cool if…?”. I KNOW you’ve had that moment too. Why didn’t you go for it? What made you wait to say someone else should do it? Why NOT you? Whenever you say no, the thing you want doesn’t go away, it goes to someone else. So stop being nice, take thoughtful action, appreciate where you’re at, and look toward where you want to go. You will be graced with the answers in so many ways once you start asking yourself what you can do instead of lamenting what you didn’t. There is always fear—but your greatness is on the other side of that fear. Face it. You will never regret it, I promise you that.