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“My ability to receive is measured by how much I practice good feeling thoughts,” Gabby Bernstein, Super Attractor Deck.  This message has come up for me a lot.  I never looked at manifesting as receiving.  I know that’s silly, but I always looked at it as creating or working with the universe to bring something to fruition.  I had to learn that manifesting, while it is about co-creating, IS about receiving.  It is also a gift in itself.

Moving forward into the new year is all about maintaining control.  Emotional control, that is.  It’s about understanding that it’s necessary to cultivate a sense of awareness that allows you to decide your state at all times.  It’s understanding that our decisions take us where we want to be, not what happens to us.  When you have that understanding you know you can choose your thoughts.

This is an art that does require practice—and I am guilty of allowing myself to get carried away with what I’m feeling in the moment.  A lot.  I have become acutely aware that if I want to make progress that I need to take charge of the things I can control—and the only thing that any of us really have control over are our actions and emotions.  Even if there are thoughts that come to mind, we can take the time to acknowledge them and move on.  It’s a lot of effort but it is effort well worth it.  Liz Gilbert speaks of her friend Richard from Texas in Eat, Pray, Love and how he told her that you have to select your thoughts the same way you select your clothes and I love that.

Cultivating good feeling thoughts allows the space for our deepest desires to come to life.  It allows the space for the things we want to manifest in the world.  This happens because when we feel good we are in alignment with our purpose and that purpose brings us fulfillment.  It also shows trust in the universe because we are being playful and going with the process, knowing that the process will get us where we need to be.

So the goal is to practice, practice, practice those good feeling thoughts.  Learn to recognize what helps us illicit that emotion and how to leave behind the things that don’t.  The things we want are on the other side of what we are afraid of.  They are on the other side of what we are afraid to let go of.  They are also on the other side of what we are afraid to admit to ourselves.  Learning what works for us, what feels emotionally good to us, helps us to discover the things we really want rather than constantly doing what we think we have to do.

Once we accept that we are meant to feel good and that we are meant for more than we have ever been told, we will see the results begin to shift in our lives.  We can learn to work through challenges because we see them as opportunities or we move onto something that is better for us.  Feeling good is the start.  Make the choice to feel good mentally and to maintain emotional control and watch what happens.

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I read Lena Dunham’s post today about lessons to take into 2020.  She wrote about going slower than you think you should because it ultimately adds up to more.  On this first day of 2020 that is a lesson I take to heart.  I’m struggling today with the little projects that genuinely looked little when I began them and then turned into an ordeal.  I literally have NO idea how that happened.  It was nothing major (just taking down interior lights and the small trees) and somehow the fucking carpets ended up cleaned, the kitchen floor washed, my son’s toys put together.  I seriously don’t know.  That’s how much auto-pilot is on for me.

I think it’s important to re-evaluate the necessity of going slow.  I’m not talking about neglecting things that need to get done, but learning to take your time in doing it.  I had to stop several times during the clean up today because I started feeling ill again.  A feeling that I hate (as I mentioned a few days ago) is helplessness.  I hate being captive to things outside of me.  And it’s even harder to accept that it’s my own body making the decisions for me.  I’m used to being able to accomplish a certain amount in a certain time and now that I can’t I feel like I’m up fighting to even stay awake.  There’s nothing I can do about it either.

So, in the spirit of shifting perspective, going slow can be the exact thing I need right now.  I had been expecting myself to enter the New Year with a bang, taking on my business and my projects and unveiling them to the world and storming forward.  I still want to do those things, that hasn’t changed, but the energy I thought I would have is absent.  It’s definitely making me think more clearly about the next steps I need to take.  There is value in going slow.  As Lena said, you ultimately get more out of it in the long run.

Admittedly, I have plowed through most of my life looking for the end result without taking a moment to savor what’s in front of me in the moment. Honestly, I think I wanted to get it done as fast as I could so I could enjoy the result more. The Universe is telling me in its own way that it’s time to take in what is around me now.  I am here NOW.  There is beauty now.  You get more substance from the end result and it lasts longer when you take the time to go through it all.

I don’t want to rush my life away–I want to revel in it.  That means enjoying the stinky parts, the difficult parts, and yes, even the slow parts.  All of that together is what makes life.  We can’t slice and dice or close our eyes through the stuff we don’t like.  I was in the middle of working on this content when my kid had a melt-down and I knew he needed a nap.  So I had to stop and put his little boy mind at ease and get him into bed and stay with him until he fell asleep.  There is nothing wrong with that.  He knows that mommy is there for him to help him when he needs it.  I wanted to be a more present parent and I did that.  The work still got done.  Time isn’t the enemy—our perception of it is.  So don’t be afraid to slow down.  It will all unfold as it should;  that is trust, that is peace.